


(Please Don't) Leave me.

by mudokun



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AOU spoilers, Alcoholism, Gen, It's a comfort fic I promise., Movie Spoilers, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-02
Updated: 2015-05-22
Packaged: 2018-03-26 18:23:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3860002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mudokun/pseuds/mudokun
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The hole in Tony’s heart had widened to the point where, just like Pandora’s box, all the evils of the world spilled out and rushed around his head, nothing left in the chambers except a fermenting desire to bite a bullet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Tony sniggered at the article displayed onscreen. _Ironman does it again_!, the caption read, deceptively positive, until he scrolled down and saw the huge picture plastered right in the center of the article: Tony Stark himself, in all his glory stumbling around in the penthouse with his lips around the neck of a bottle. “Sure did.” He agreed, gesturing to the screen to make it fade to clear. Inspired by himself, Tony stood up and headed to the liquor cabinet for more. It was nice having a more-or-less empty tower. He could get blind-drunk and nobody was there to stop him. Not anymore, anyway.

This time, he went for something a little harder, faster. Bourbon on the rocks. He couldn’t care less about the price tag these days. His cache of fucks was clear out. Zip. Gone.

  
With every drink, Tony Stark continued to rapidly drift out of sobriety. Pepper got so fed up with him that she outright demanded him to tell her why he was so down, and when he couldn’t, she decided that 'they' needed a break. He barely had the emotional energy to beg her not to. In retrospect, Tony almost felt happy for her, it was about time she joined the others in the rapidly piling group of ‘people who have abandoned Tony Stark’. He missed her comfort and her legs and her gentle condescending call of “Tony” and the way she stroked his hair when he felt like his heart was about to shatter into pieces. But hey, at least she wasn’t dead.

It barely stung when Vision came to life, who was meant to be Jarvis up until the point where he said, “I am not Jarvis.”. Tony didn’t have the time to worry about what happened to his AI in the process of trying to save the world from mass extinction, and it wasn’t like the team would let him if he wanted to anyway. Turned out, putting off grief was like putting off a car crash. Even Tony admitted he was ridiculously stupid to think he could just not grieve for Jarvis for the rest of his life. Just a few months ago he celebrated the AI’s 14th birthday with the robot gang, his gift to Jarvis a remote platinum suit and a promise to lay off drinking for at least a week. What he wouldn’t give to go back in time and relive that moment all over again. Hell, he’d swear off all of it for the rest of his life if it meant Jarvis could come back, but it was kind of obvious that God had blocked his number a while ago.

The hole in Tony’s heart had widened to the point where, just like Pandora’s box, all the evils of the world spilled out and rushed around his head, nothing left in the chambers except a fermenting desire to bite a bullet.

As hours slipped into the evening, Tony languished on the sofa and quickly gave up on glasses, going straight for the bottle. In an hour, maybe less, Tony was almost ready to pass out, drooling out the side of his mouth in sweet senselessness. His slow drift into unconsciousness was rudely interrupted by a soft knock on the door, raising his drooped lids in a muted sense of surprise.

Tony frowned and tried to sit up. He’d ordered Friday, the new girl to lock the upper floors. There weren’t many people he would be too happy to see right now. Maybe Bruce, but it looked like he wasn’t coming back from being AWOL anytime soon. Maybe even never.

“Who erss it!” Tony slurred, stumbling to his feet as he prepared to face whoever it was. “Coulson?” he guessed. It would be just like him to rock up at the outrageously late time of 7pm.

There was a pause, then Vision drifted through the door. “Oh dear, they really weren’t making it up.” He stated as soon as his eyes rested upon Tony’s drunken state.  
Tony swayed backwards, finding it hard to differentiate between hallucinations and real life, especially since the guy insisted on floating like some kind of ghost (which wouldn’t be too far off). “Oh, not-Jervus, uh, Jarvis.” He slurred, eventually recognising his visitor as he came into unsteady focus. “Hey…not-Jarvis. Not that there’s …something wrong with being not-Jarvis.” He added as an afterthought. “Everybody’s not-Jarvis now."

The Vision looked uncomfortable, still hovering in mid-air. “Perhaps we’d better get you to bed.” He commented, moving forward and landing softly on the carpeted floor, noticing how it held a vague scent of stale beer. Tony watched him through clouded eyes, only letting out a slight groan as Vision picked him up and placed him over his shoulder. “You’ll feel better in the morning.” He assured the human as he began to head for Tony’s bedroom, knowing the location out of something close to instinct. Vision placed Tony down on the sheets and instructed Friday to turn off the lights. “Try to sleep well…Tony.” He stated, waiting a moment before leaving, his cape gliding out behind him like a ripple on the surface of a quiet pond.

Tony started to laugh at himself, his eyes starting to sting again. Of all the people in the world, Vision would be the last to stick around. Life was so fucking unfair. He really blew it.


	2. Chapter 2

The morning after, Tony woke up to the distinctly crap feeling that there was a vice clamped onto his skull. “BLINDS!” he cried out, Friday quickly closing them to shut out the glare of the sunrise. He felt a little bad for yelling at the newly installed AI, who already had to deal with following Jarvis’ performance. He laid still in bed for a few moments, dreading the passing of time, and the inevitable stumble to the bathroom.  
“Good morning.” The Vision said from behind.

Tony startled, his skull beginning to buckle under the pressure. “Hey, not on, Casper.” He hissed as he rolled over to face him, his eyes dropping to the android’s hands, one holding a small capsule, the other holding a glass. The Vision glanced at him curiously. “I thought you might appreciate some painkillers and water.” He explained, placing them on the bedside table after a moment of hesitation. Tony stared at him, causing Vision to hesitate even more. “…I couldn’t help noticing your appearance in the tabloids.” He admitted. “…I think you may have a drinking problem.”

Tony continued to stare at him blankly for a few seconds, then burst into a laughter that quickly softened as his head rung in pain. “Good one, real good. You really didn’t know, huh? Really that clueless?” he asked as he reached over to the glass of water, kicking the sheets off so he could sit on the end of the bed furthest from Vision.

“Well, I was born a month ago.” Vision admitted with an attempt at a smile. Tony swallowed the pills and rubbed his eyes. “Why do you drink?” Vision asked, with a softness in his voice that Jarvis never once used.

Tony looked Vision up and down, resting on his face for a second before he looked away and rubbed his eyes again. “You weren’t invited here. Leave. Vanish.”  
Vision hesitated a moment, then turned to the wall to adhere to Tony’s order. The inventor thought it was funny and was unable to stifle the half-scoff, half-sob that erupted from his lips. Vision stopped, paused yet again, and turned around. 

“What…is the matter?” he asked carefully.  
Tony paused, turned around and looked up at the android, his eyes bloodshot. “You know, when Bruce and I were trying to put Jarvis in your body, we weren’t trying to create someone new. Literally just, ‘Jarvis in a body’. Then thunderpants came along and decided he’ll do it himself. I guess Blondie was just trying to help. Can’t blame him, I suppose.” He said, no warmth to his words.

Vision swallowed. “You resent what happened.” He stated quietly.  
“Nah. Don’t say that. You’re just the walking embodiment of my best friend who’s not really my best friend. No biggie.” He retorted, bringing the glass to his lips, his teeth clacking against the ice cubes.

Unable to control his emotions, Vision’s bottom lip began to quiver. “I knew you didn't like me. You hate what happened – you hate me.” He uttered. Tony felt like a monster, but he didn't care. He had no heart left to give a damn with. He rubbed his face and turned away from him again.

“I couldn't begin to imagine how important Jarvis was to you.” Vision offered hopelessly, after seeing that Tony wasn't going to acknowledge him.

“Yeah.” Tony began, looking like a whole lot of something had been ignited in him, and that there was no putting it out. “Okay, you know what? That’s the thing, that’s the one thing that I can’t stand. You insist that you’re not Jarvis, but you keep using his voice. So every time I hear you say something I have to remind myself it’s not him, it’s just you. You’re not Jarvis. You said it yourself.” He finished, looking up at the android. “You’re Vision.” He concluded, spitting out the name as if it were the reason for Jarvis’ death.

“Is that…is that why you are doing all this?” Vision asked in despair. “Because of me?”  
“More or less.” Tony replied, turning away to face the wall.

Vision glanced around the room, noticing the faint coating of dust on the legs of the bed, the ring-shaped stains on the surface of the bedside table, the empty box of tissues discarded on the floor, and the smothering rank of alcohol masking the overwhelming atmosphere of grief in the room.

“I am Jarvis…but there is more to me than there used to be. I could not call myself Jarvis, knowing that, knowing…that I am not the same.” Vision began quietly, looking sadly at Tony. “I suppose you wouldn’t understand, how utterly strange it is to finally have a body after being a mind for so long. I am trying my hardest to recover what memories I had of being your Jarvis, before I had become the Vision. I feel so lost.” He ached. “And still, it somehow it kills me to see you so upset with me. I want to try to be your friend again, but I’m afraid that you will only be wanting your Jarvis back, and that you will never learn to treat me more than the being who took the place of your closest companion. Let alone, to treat me as your friend.”

Vision waited a full minute for a response from the back turned against him. “Tony?” he asked sorrowfully. Tony said nothing for a while, holding the glass in his hand, watching the ice melt as time stretched on by. Vision let out a soft sigh and turned around to leave, his back hunched over in defeat. 

“Lesson one in learning how to be Jarvis. Call me Sir.” Tony announced, turning to look at Vision, something new in the steady stare of his brown eyes, something almost hopeful.  
Vision’s face lit up, and he turned back to Tony. “Well, I wouldn’t know about…-” he began, seeing how Tony’s face dropped, how utterly broken the man would be if Vision didn’t humour him, at least for a little while. He quickly rectified himself, saying “Yes Sir.” Tony nodded and patted the space on the bed beside him. Vision walked over and sat down, a small smile fixed upon his red vibranium lips.

From sunrise, to sunset, Tony taught, and Vision learned.


End file.
